The remote executive assistant industry is built on a foundation of outdated advice, feel-good myths, and strategies that sound professional but fail spectacularly in practice. If you’re struggling as a remote EA, it’s probably not your fault—you’ve been following advice that doesn’t work in the real world.
Let’s dismantle the biggest myths and reveal what actually works.
Myth #1: “Be Available 24/7 to Prove Your Value”
The Lie: Great remote EAs are always “on.” They respond to emails at midnight, work weekends, and never say no.
The Reality: The most successful remote EAs I know are ruthlessly protective of their time. Here’s why the “always available” approach backfires:
- It trains executives to have unrealistic expectations
- You become a bottleneck because everything has to go through you
- Burnout makes you less effective, not more valuable
- You attract executives who don’t respect boundaries
What Actually Works: Set specific availability windows and stick to them. “I check email at 8am, 1pm, and 4pm CST. For true emergencies, text me at [number].” Executives respect this more than desperate availability because it shows you understand priority management.
The counterintuitive truth: The harder you are to reach, the more executives value your time when they get it.
Myth #2: “Remote EAs Need to Be Tech Wizards”
The Lie: You need to master every productivity tool, automation platform, and software suite to be competitive.
The Reality: Tool obsession is procrastination in disguise. I’ve seen EAs spend hours creating elaborate Notion setups that their executives never look at, or building complex Zapier workflows that break the moment someone changes a process.
What Actually Works: Master the basics ruthlessly well. Your executive uses email, calendar, and maybe one project management tool. Become impossibly good at those three things. Everything else is noise.
The most valuable EAs I know use boring tools exceptionally well rather than fancy tools poorly.
Myth #3: “Always Say Yes to Build Trust”
The Lie: Good EAs never push back. They take on whatever their executive throws at them with a smile.
The Reality: Saying yes to everything is the fastest way to become ineffective. Your job isn’t to be agreeable—it’s to be useful. That means saying no to low-value requests so you can deliver excellence on high-impact work.
What Actually Works: Become comfortable with responses like:
- “I can do that, but it means the board presentation prep gets pushed to tomorrow. Is that the priority?”
- “That’s going to take me 4 hours. Is this the best use of my time right now?”
- “I’m not the right person for this task. Let me connect you with [better option].”
Executives don’t want yes-people. They want good judgment. Saying no intelligently demonstrates better judgment than saying yes indiscriminately.
Myth #4: “Proactive Communication Means Constant Updates”
The Lie: Keep your executive informed by sending regular status updates, progress reports, and check-ins throughout the day.
The Reality: Most EAs confuse communication volume with communication value. Flooding your executive’s inbox with updates on routine tasks is noise, not service.
What Actually Works: Only communicate when:
- Something requires a decision
- Plans have changed
- A problem needs escalation
- You’ve completed something they’re waiting for
Your executive’s attention is their most valuable resource. Protect it fiercely, even from yourself.
Myth #5: “Remote Work Means You Need Perfect Video Call Skills”
The Lie: Invest in great lighting, a professional background, and flawless video call etiquette.
The Reality: Nobody cares how you look on video calls. They care whether you solve their problems efficiently. I know successful remote EAs who rarely turn their cameras on and others who take most calls from their car.
What Actually Works: Focus on audio quality and reliable internet. Everything else is vanity. Your value comes from what you do between calls, not how polished you appear during them.
Myth #6: “Build Relationships with Everyone”
The Lie: Great EAs are relationship builders who connect with everyone in the organization.
The Reality: Trying to build relationships with everyone makes you nobody’s priority. You have limited time and attention. Spread it too thin, and you become generically pleasant but specifically useless.
What Actually Works: Identify the 5-7 people who most directly impact your executive’s success. Build real working relationships with those people. Everyone else gets professional courtesy, nothing more.
This isn’t about being antisocial—it’s about being strategically focused.
The Uncomfortable Truth About Remote EA Success
Here’s what nobody tells you: The most successful remote EAs aren’t the ones who work the hardest or care the most. They’re the ones who understand that their job is to be systematically useful, not emotionally indispensable.
They set boundaries, charge appropriately for their time, and treat the relationship as a professional partnership rather than a personal mission. They know that executives respect competence more than dedication, and results more than effort.
The executives who pay top dollar for remote EAs aren’t looking for someone to manage their feelings or validate their importance. They want someone who can make complex logistics disappear so they can focus on the work only they can do.
Stop trying to be the perfect assistant. Start being the indispensable operator.
The difference will transform both your effectiveness and your career.
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